*gasp* I've posted again.

So I've been working like a fiend, and still barely making ends meet.  Well, it has been rather feast or famine, actually.  So, some weeks I am working like a dog with no time off at all, and others I am twiddling my thumbs with not enough to do.  And trying to get work on the twiddle thumbs weeks is challenging because there is almost no time to ramp up to employment over 3-5 days.

twiddles thumbs

My "Betty" job for the commercial producer has not *ahem* ... "produced" any commercial casting for me yet, but has been a fun and easy job thus far.  My concern now is that her big party season is over, and will she still need me?  Last week I only worked 3.5 hours and this week am only scheduled to work about 8. Mama needs some more hours than that!

Just to recap that job - I am basically a wife.  I run errands, grocery shop, do a little light filing at her home office, do craft projects for the kids' school or birthday or whatnot, and help with events at the school or various parties and functions.

luckily I don't have to clean, take care of the kids, or give head! 

My weekend job is still about the same.  The daily rate is really really nice, but it is hard work and inconsistent as well.

My man-piece is still there, and we are navigating the waters of relationship fairly well.  We like to do things together, and we also do things apart.  The confusing thing to me is about two or three months ago, I thought he was going to drop the "L" word.  Then he didn't.  And now we've been dating just about six months and still no "L" word.  I'm just a little confused... is he not saying it because he doesn't know if he feels it, or is he not saying it because he doesn't want to move our relationship that fast? Does he feel saying it is the same as putting a ring on my finger and he's not ready for that? Or is it that he doesn't want to get my hopes up for a ring at all?????

On the one hand, I am not getting any younger, and I don't want to waste my time. But on the other hand, I don't want to rush through/past something just because it isn't completely apparently clear exaaaactily how it will turn out.  meh.  where's my crystal ball???