everything you SHOULDN'T do to score big with the ladies

a real actual email I received on the man-candy-site. you can't make this shit up. 

you're a "normal person" and "educated." somehow I find this hard to believe.


allow me to address some of his questions:
"are you single?" uhmmmm, well, I am on a dating site, and my profile says I am single, so... yes.
"where are you from" again, pretty clear on my profile that I'm from Texas but have lived in NYC and am now in LA
"what are your interests?"well, again, I am going to direct you to my profile, where I list what I am all about and like to do.
"so you looking to settle down?" on my profile, which you clearly have not read, it states that I am looking for someone to spend my life with.  idiot.

listen bucko, you're 41, have no skills whatsoever, are hideously unattractive, think text messaging is a good way to get to know someone, and use patronizing terms like "sweetie."  you're going to have to do better than cut and paste. 

username: man4lady4me (huh? you want a man for a lady for you? this is supposed to appeal to a woman somehow?)
summary of his profile: each section is cut and pasted from the last section, with no further improvements in spelling or grammar. literally, each section is exactly the same as the last, even though the question is different and not at all answered in his cut and pasted essay.
personality conveyed on his profile page: highly bitter, rudely demanding, with his "likes" including swimming, jet skiing, shopping, theme parks, and cuddling.  random much?

fairly sure if I would have replied to his email he would have told me he just "won the lottery" in some foreign land but needed help to get the money, namely my bank account information.

hello, real man? boyfriend? I'm ready for you now please.