I found myself with no job, no car and no boyfriend. I searched for all three. And I found them! Then I lost them. Then I found them again, and a bunch of other stuff happened. So I guess what I wanna know is... Are we there yet?
You might remember that I thought one of the tinderdudes was going to be boyfriend material. I was going to write the whole saga, but then I realized it was long and drawn-out and I didn't want to give any more effort to a guy not worth my time.
Borrring
Let's just say he couldn't handle life and a relationship at the same time and leave it at that.
As I return to the tinders however, I am rethinking things and considering begging him to take me back...
the little tyke just won't stay down...
His "about me" is incomplete. It should be "...camping, fishing, reading, football, ... drowning small children."
At first I thought he was attempting a funny face (and failing) but after looking at the rest of his pictures I realized his face got frozen this way. His mother should have warned him.
He's 34... right. And I'm 17. I mean, there's someone for everyone, right? Even vegan satanists. I'm pretty sure the southern Baptists I grew up with think everyone in California is like this dude.
And this guy I'm fairly certain is homeless and lives near the freeway underpass by my house.
Dear Tinderdude that was almost my BF, PLEASE for the love of all things Tinder, take me BACK!!! Maybe you'll grow up one of these days and be a man. I'll take my chances! Thank you. Sincerely, Willing to Settle (but not totally)
Recently I have noticed some guys "about me" sections are filled with bitterness about why bother writing this section when this app is all about looks, and how they keep matching with "bots" and are there any real profiles on here, etc. One guy in particular apparently matched more than once with a girl whose phone mysteriously stopped working and wouldn't you mind going to my website?
insert credit card number here...
I feel only slightly lucky that there don't seem to be such "bots" luring the women.
First of all, who do these men expect to attract with their bitter-betty attitudes? And second, these guys are usually not very good looking. No looks and a shitty attitude? No wonder they only match with people trying to sell them something!! And clearly they have no brains either because they fall for it...
well.
Dear these men,
On a scale of 1 - 10, you are clearly a 4. Maybe even a 6 on a really really good day. If you match with a woman who is a 10+++, you are mistaken if you think she really likes you. Capitalists are everywhere, and as one can tell by the absolute infinite amount of porn on the internet, every advertising campaign ever, and the website www.sugardaddyforme.com, they especially prey on men who are thinking with their dicks.
Maybe next time work on your attitude, take a trip to the gym (or 20), and post something about yourself someone might want to know, not just how you have been swindled. Oh, and maybe just maybe, if she looks like she's out of your league, she is.
